The Wandering-Mind

I remember feeling the kind of pain that was so much worse than any kind of physical pain could touch. No matter how hard I tried to explain it, letters mixed into words just couldn’t describe it. I waited for time to heal it, yet it only grew worse. I tried unspeakable ways to cope or ease it and did not prevail. I came to realize that I would never feel the way I had felt before because it didn’t go away; it became a part of me. I had to learn how to live with it every day in everything that I do. I had to learn to accept it with loving arms or it would tear me apart every single day. I had to choose to accept the change that was ultimately a change in me. Life-changing events wreck our world and make us question everything we once believed in, altering our lives forever. The hardest part is accepting that who we are from that point forward is not who we were the day before. Going on means leaving the person we were behind and that is an incredibly horrifying thought. Some would even say it was impossible; at least I did. That mind frame inevitably slows the healing process, or the “changing process” as I like to call it. If you’re going through a changing process in your life right now I need you to know that you are not alone. The pain is intense, and feelings of hopelessness can take over you; reach out to a loved one. Tomorrows may never be the same, but they can be better than before if you allow them.